


Stood In The Storm.

by mylifeismediocre



Category: Emmerdale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-10
Updated: 2018-08-10
Packaged: 2019-06-25 09:57:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15638403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mylifeismediocre/pseuds/mylifeismediocre
Summary: I wrote this after someone commented about Liv discovering she had cancer.





	Stood In The Storm.

It all began in the shower, the morning of the wedding. Liv was lathering shower gel all over her body when she felt something that she’d not been aware of before. A small bump, a lump, on the left side of her stomach. Peering down at her naturally tan skin, her breath caught in her throat as anxious thoughts dictated her mind, slowly turning up the volume within her head.

She tried to reassure herself, convince herself it was nothing, just a spot that hadn’t grown a head yet, or maybe a build-up of liquid that would disappear within a week. It was Aaron and Robert’s wedding day. There was no way she could confide her fears in either of them. Today was their day, and she was not about to ruin it. Opening the shower door, she took a deep breath, wiped away the few tears that had dared to fall, wrapped herself up in a towel, and set out to put her dress on, pushing it all to the back of her mind.

Liv had completely forgotten about her worrying morning when she saw the smiles upon her brothers’ faces as they said ‘I do’. Her heart leapt within her chest knowing she belonged to a family. A little brother in Seb, and parents within Aaron, Robert, Chas and Paddy. She felt a sense of belonging, and hope. Grateful she had found stability in a house where she was loved, and wanted. Reaching down to scratch an itch on her abdomen, she felt the lump again, her breath catching in her throat for the second time that day. She heard Vic whisper her name from further down the pew they were sat in, the older woman mouthing a quick ‘are you alright’, causing Liv to nod in return, mentally cursing herself for drawing attention to herself, her blue eyes looking up, just as Aaron and Robert kissed one another, claps and cheers erupting from the guests. Liv stood up with the rest, clapping, no emotion on her face as the fear was filling her mind. Aaron’s hand reaching for her arm brought her back to the moment, and just like that, she was smiling again, following the couple out of the church.

She was unsure if she was paranoid, but she was beginning to feel faint. Liv was unsure if it was her anxiety making her feel that way, or the lump that had formed upon her skin. Her fingers went down to it, feeling it through the fabric of her chest. ‘It’s got bigger since this morning’ she thought to herself. She was unaware of her heavy breathing until she felt herself falling, her head making contact with the wooden floor within the pub, and as quickly as she lost consciousness, her eyes closed too.

\---

Aaron had been talking to Paddy, the two coming up with a secret plan to get Rob to drink out of the welly, when it happened. And Robert had been getting a photo with Vic and Seb when he saw Liv’s body fall to the floor. Gasps of shock filled the room as Aaron dived down to sit beside his little sister, his hands flying to her cheeks, as he watch his husband drop to his knees the other side of the teen, worriedness evident on his face.

“Liv, Liv, Olivia, can you hear me?” Her brother desperately cried, the man ready to call an ambulance until a thought crossed his mind. Turning his head round to look at the guests, he had only one thought in his brain. “Has she had a drink? Has anyone given her a drink?” He raised his voice, frustration taking over his features as everyone shook their heads in response.

“Aaron.” Robert’s voice brought him back into the moment. He looked across at his new husband with his eyebrows raised slightly, and tears glazing over his eyes. “She’s waking up.”

The two men looked down at the teen, her blue eyes slowly, but surely, opening, smiling softly at the sight of her brothers. Robert’s hand came to her forehead, not liking how hot she was, before stroking her hair back and out of her face.

“She’s burning up.” The blonde whispered.

“Are you okay?” Aaron asked her, clutching onto both her hands tighter than she thought were possible, silently cursing how overprotective her brother could get in the blink of an eye.

“I’m fine. Just got a little dizzy.” Liv reassured them, not wanting to tell them the truth and ruin the most important day of their lives, although she felt like she already had by making a scene. Her eyes fell upon Robert, his forehead creased with concern, reading her like an open book, knowing she was holding something back.

“I think we should get you into bed, so you can sleep that temperature off.” He told her, not allowing her to respond as he already held onto her hand, ready to help her up. He let Aaron slide a hand under her back, his other reaching to hold hers, and then they were pulling her up, stabling her body.

“I can manage.” The teen stubbornly announced, shrugging off their hands of support, putting one foot in front of the other, before holding onto the bar for dear life, feeling herself feel faint again.

“Okay.” Aaron sarcastically replied, Robert and him joining her at the bar, reaching for either side of her and helping her into the back room of the pub, letting her relax into the couch cushions before fetching the blanket off the back of the armchair, Robert tucking it around her as Aaron grabbed her a glass of water and some painkillers, leaving them both on the coffee table as he leant down to press a kiss to her forehead. “Get some sleep.” He whispered, taking the quiet hum she made as a response, her eyes already closing as the pair left the room.

\---

It was a few days later when the teen felt the lump again, and her paranoia made her believe it was even bigger. She did the only thing she could think of doing. She googled her symptoms, not sure where she would like the ‘diagnosis’ it would give her. Lying in bed, phone in her hand, she searched the web for some answers.

She was greeted with the conclusion that she had a hernia. She breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that it wasn’t cancer. She tapped the number for the doctors into her phone, making an appointment for within an hour, wanting to get started on some antibiotics before the next decision was decided. Liv, also, came to the conclusion not tell Aaron or Robert, not wanting to worry them when they were all loved up in the honeymoon phase. And she knew they’d be grateful for an empty house, for reasons she’d rather not think about.

The teen got dressed, pulling her hair up into a ponytail before descending down the stairs, finding her brothers in the kitchen, both munching on some toast, eyes never leaving one another.

“I’m going out.” She announced, slamming the door behind her before they could stop her, heading towards the bus stop. Taking a deep breath, she made her way onto the bus, sitting down towards the end of the vehicle, her legs bouncing up and down subconsciously.

\---

The minute her name got called, Liv felt her anxiety take control of her entire body as she walked through the waiting room to get to the door, being held open for her by the nurse. Taking a seat in the chair beside the desk, the doctor turned to face her, asking her the reasoning of her appointment.

“I think I have a hernia.” She explained, her voice shaky from the confession.

“And what makes you think that?” 

“About a week ago, I found a lump on my side. I passed out and have had a temperature ever since, so I googled it and a hernia was the conclusion.”

“Can I have a look at it?” He asked her, watching her nod in response as the nurse directed her to the bed in the corner of the room, helping her get on it before watching the teen lie down, lifting up the side of her t-shirt for the doctor to have a look.

The silence within the room was enough to set Liv on edge. All she wanted was some antibiotics and then to go home. In that moment, she regretted not telling anyone, wishing there was someone to hold her hand and tell her everything was going to be okay, but she didn’t want to ruin the happiness of her family, post wedding. 

She felt the doctor’s fingertips over the lump in her skin, squeezing her eyes shut out of fear before he told her to sit up.

“I think you should get that checked out immediately, so I’ll ring the hospital, and they can take a sample of it.” He explained as she stood up and took a seat in the chair beside his desk. “Do you have anyone to come with you?” He added, looking at her sympathetically.

“No, I’ll be fine on my own.” She smiled, concluding the final notes with the doctor, accepting the piece of paper with all the notes on it and left the room.

Liv felt more anxious leaving the doctors than when she entered. Sitting down on the bus, she felt a frog in her throat, wishing this was all a dream. Staring at the world beyond the window made her wonder if anyone else was feeling the way she was. Or if everyone was the happiest they could be and not even considered any of this. She felt so isolated. No one would understand, no one would listen. It was always going to be her, only her, and no one else. She was going to get through this alone. Aaron and Robert didn’t need to know. She wasn’t going to be the one to ruin their honeymoon happiness. ‘It’s better if they don’t know’ she thought to herself. So, in the backseat of the bus, on a rainy Wednesday, Liv made the worst decision of her life.

\---

Sitting in the waiting room in the gastroenterology department of Hotten General was intimidating to anyone, let alone a teenage girl. The walls were covered in random posters about anything and everything, and the walls were that not blue, but green. And all Liv could smell was the intense scent of hand sanitizer and latex gloves. The chairs of the room were filled mainly with older people, and Liv knew she was the youngest one in there by about thirty years.

Flicking through a magazine from six years ago, Liv heard her name being called. Rising from her feet, all the elderly people gave her sympathetic smiles, and she could feel her body shaking with fear.

Sitting down in the plastic chair, she handed over the sheet of paper from her doctor and watched with intense concentration the reaction of the consultant beside her. And before she knew it, she was laying down on a bed again having the lump looked at and tested. Every time someone’s fingers came in contact with her skin, she flinched, wanting nothing more than to be at home with nothing to worry about.

“We’ll send these off and we’ll contact you when we get the results, okay?” The consultant explained, causing her to nod and leave the hospital as quickly as she could, hopping straight on the bus, happy to be heading home.

\---

Walking through the front door, Liv did her best to plaster a fake smile across her face, sliding off her shoes and leaving them by the other shoes just inside the flat.

Robert was at the stove, cooking, and from what Liv could smell, it was pasta. Aaron was sat at the kitchen table, scrolling through his phone, looking up when he heard her come through the door, a soft smile on his face as she sat opposite him.

“So, what have you been up to today?” He asked his sister, noticing how tense she looked, how pale she looked, and he could see that her leg was bouncing up and down, a clear sign that she was anxious, and the shrug she gave in return confirmed that she wasn’t herself.

“Gabby popped by earlier to hang out.” Robert announced. “We thought you were with her.”

“No, just out and about.” She explained, and she could see her brother looking straight through her. “I rang mum, and stuff.” She added, knowing immediately that would stop his worried gaze, a soft nod and sympathetic smile proved that it worked.

“She alright?”

“Yeah.”

Liv was incredibly happy to see a plate of pasta being placed in front of her. She had yet to eat, too anxious to. But after the first mouthful, she began to feel the vomit creeping up her body before she felt it in her throat, hopping up from her place at the table, and heading straight for the sink, feeling relieved as it came out without having to heave. 

“My cooking that bad?” Robert tried to joke, earning a kick from his husband under the table.

However, Liv was still continuing to be sick. She couldn’t even think what was in her stomach that her body insisted to throw up. This was her first meal in twenty four hours, and suddenly every meal she’d ever eaten was coming up as well. She didn’t even notice Aaron stand up from his place at the table, taking the hairband out of her hair, before tying it back up again so it wouldn’t get in the way, before resting his hand on her back, looking at his husband with a frown.

“You okay?” He asked, as she wiped her mouth, turning the tap on to wash it down the drain, turning around to face her concerned family.

“Yeah, just got a bit of a headache.” She said quietly, knowing exactly what the next question was going to be. She saw Robert begin to speak, before Aaron cut in front.

“Have you been drinking?”

“No. I’m a bit poorly, and you immediately assume I’m necking vodka?” Liv angrily raised her voice. She wanted to cry and tell them the truth but the words wouldn’t come out. They were just staring at her, clearly worried, and she hated that she was getting in the way.

“Liv, we’re just worried about you, okay?” Robert reassured.

“Well, a little faith, and a little trust would be nice.” And with that, she was storming upstairs, slamming her bedroom door shut and hiding under the covers of her duvet, crying until she fell asleep.

\---

As Robert put the plates in the dishwasher, Aaron was distracted when he noticed Liv had left her phone on the table, a text appearing across her screen. He couldn’t help himself, lifting it up so he could see the message that had come through, bringing a hand to stroke the stubble on his face as his heart dropped at the message he was reading.

‘Olivia Flaherty, ring for the results of your examination in four days. If symptoms proceed to get worse, call 111 or make an appointment with your GP.’

From the sequence of events, Aaron wondered what Liv was up to. It was unlike her to go to the doctors, and it was unlike her to put herself through tests. Especially on her own. He just continued to stare at the message until Robert removed the phone from his hands, taking a look for herself, whilst resting one hand on his husband’s shoulder.

“I wonder what this is all about.” The blonde said, his forehead creased with concerned, as he too, read the message over and over again. He watched Aaron snatch the phone back, reading it for the last time before rising from his seat at the table.

“Only one way to find out.” He said as he began walking up the stairs, Robert in tow as they knocked on her bedroom door, only to receive no reply, causing Aaron’s hand to push the door handle down, only to find Liv, asleep on her side, under the covers of her bed, tear stains evident on her face, and even in her slumber, they could tell something wasn’t right. But neither men wanted to wake her, finding it unusual for the teen to fall asleep this early. So Aaron placed her phone on her bedside table, pressing a kiss to her forehead, allowing Robert to do the same, before they both left, quietly shutting the door behind them, both making the decision to ask her about it in the morning.

\---

Liv awoke the next morning to the sun shining in through her window, content with the fact that it wasn’t raining. Checking her phone beside her, she was shocked to see the time was almost ten in the morning, before reading the message that had popped up on her screen nine hours ago, explaining what she had to do in relation to the tests. She felt her heart break a little, thinking the entire ordeal of the previous day had been nothing but a dream, but was nothing but stone hard reality.

Swinging her legs off her bed so she was sat up, she pulled her t-shirt up, cursing herself for falling asleep in yesterday’s clothes, running her fingers over the lump on the left side of her body, and her mind immediately going into overdrive when she felt it getting bigger. The lump was solid, and an odd shape, and after googling hernias, all anyone ever talked about was going through surgery to have it removed. How was she going to have surgery without anyone knowing anything? This was going to be harder than she thought.

Last night’s events began to catch up with her though. Liv remembered throwing up, before being questioned about her drinking before storming upstairs where she clearly fell asleep. It was putting her off going downstairs to get something to eat, considering nothing was left in her stomach. She mentally discussed with herself whether she should tell them she’d been drinking to throw them off of what was really going on, but she neglected that idea when she remembered they would probably ground her and put her through the withdrawal process that she didn’t actually need.

Gaining a little confident, she opened her bedroom door, and began to make her way downstairs, relieved to find the kitchen empty. Putting two pieces of bread in the toaster, she sat down at the table, scrolling through her phone. Her heart dropped, though, when she heard two sets of footsteps make their way down the metal staircase. She glanced up at them as they both made their way to the table, sitting down, making small talk about what they should have for breakfast. 

“Good sleep?” Robert asked her as she jumped up when she heard the ping of the toaster, heading for the fridge to get some butter out, before putting the two slices of toast on a plate.

Liv hummed in agreement, trying to focus all her energy spreading the butter over the bread, hoping she wouldn’t get interrogated by them, not wanting to think about the current circumstances any more than she needed to. 

“You left your phone down here last night and you had a message from the NHS about tests? Is there something you want to tell us?” Aaron’s shaky voice spoke, causing her to spin around to face the pair with an annoyed look on her face, but also a look of defeat.

“Why were you reading my messages?” She snapped, frustrated that they couldn’t just leave her alone, like she had to them. 

“Olivia, you need to start being honest.” Robert demanded, the use of her full name immediately sending shivers down her spine, causing her to just stare at the two men watching her like the guards did when she was in young offenders. She felt like she couldn’t catch a break anywhere.

“They just wanted me to have a blood test because I haven’t had one for a while. I used to be anaemic when I was younger, they just wanted to check up on that, okay?” She felt proud of how well she lied, the sympathetic smiles and nods confirmed that they believed her. She almost wanted to laugh at them, they were so naïve. And normally, it would be the other way around.

“So why didn’t you just tell us?” Aaron asked her softly, not wanting to force anymore out of her.

“You’re in the honeymoon phase. Was hardly appropriate to spring this on you. I’m not that mean.” She sarcastically said, before taking a bite from her slice of toast, grateful to have them off her back, grateful with her talent of lying.

The conversation turned back to breakfast, the boys messing about, the atmosphere no longer tense but light hearted, and for the first time in a little while, Liv felt proud of herself.

\---

When Monday morning rolled around, Liv was terrified of phoning for the results. She didn’t want to have surgery, and there was no way she could get around that without telling the truth to Aaron and Robert. And she wasn’t in the mood to be grounded for the rest of her life either. With her phone pressed to her ear, she held her breath as she awaited the inevitable news.

“Your consultant wishes to discuss your results in person. We can arrange for someone to bring you here if you’d like.” The woman on the end of the phone announced, but Liv shook her head, forgetting that they couldn’t see her.

“I can make my own way there, its fine. I’ll get ready to leave now.”

\---

Cancer. The lump upon her skin was cancerous, and it was growing. And Liv needed to be started on chemotherapy as soon as possible to begin treating it before it began to spread to other parts of her body.

It didn’t feel real. How did she end up with cancer? Was this karma for all the bad things she had done? Aaron and Robert didn’t need this right now. She already felt a degree of separation from them and they didn’t even know. She was watching the doctor’s lips move but she couldn’t hear the words coming out, all she could hear was this noise within her head that could only be described as fear. And the Dingle’s. They were already going through this with Sarah, they didn’t need to support her too, especially as she wasn’t technically part of their family. All she would ever be as an outsider. But now she was an outsider with cancer.

The consultant offered to pay for a taxi for her, which she accepted, after receiving some leaflets about accepting the diagnosis, offering to put her on the waiting list of a local therapist, and booking her in for her first round of chemo. 

But all Liv could think about was going home and having to explain to her family that she was poorly, something she wished she’d never have to do. She’d never wanted a hernia so bad.

Staring out the window of the taxi, it was like the world was trying to throw the fact that she had cancer in her face. A sunny Monday in August. Families having picnics in the park, the scent of barbeques filled the air, ice cream was being handed around like it was the only think Hotten had in stock. It didn’t feel real. It felt like an out of body experience, or a really vivid dream. But the one thing Liv was sure of, was how terrified she was.

\---

She got déjà vu as she walked through the front door of the mill, finding Aaron and Robert sat on the couch watching reruns of top gear, immediately turning it off when they noticed Liv had tears in her eyes. Her brother was up in a second, hugging her, stroking her hair, asking what was wrong, but all she could do was cry. Aaron looked at his husband who had now stood up too and was looking at the sibling’s, concern written across his face, and worry written across Aaron’s.

When she eventually calmed down, she sat down in the armchair, accepted the glass of water her brother offered her, before she watched the pair sit back down on the couch, watching her every move, wondering who would ask first.

“What’s brought this on?” Robert asked, his voice soft and calm, soothing Liv slightly, but then it all came back that she was going to have to break their hearts, and ruin their happiness.

“You’re not going to like what I’m going to say.” Liv breathed out, a few stray tears falling as she prepared herself for the hardest thing she was ever going to have to do. Aaron knelt in front of her, resting his hands on her knees.

“You’re scaring me.” He whispered, his voice shaky as he watched her try and avoid eye contact with him, one of his thumbs reached up to wipe the tears from her face, as he watched her take a deep breath, mentally preparing himself for whatever she was going to say.

“The morning of your wedding, I was in the shower, and found something.” 

“What did you find?” Robert asked calmly, sliding along to the other side of the sofa so he was closer to the pair, not wanting to miss a word. He could see Aaron shaking, and he could see Liv struggling to say whatever she was hiding and it was making him feel sick seeing her so hurt, and seeing the worry on Aaron’s face put worry on his too.

“I found a lump on the left side of my stomach.” And then she was crying all over again.

Aaron and Robert were in shock, both just looking at her, knowing exactly what she was trying to say but not wanting to believe the truth of her reality. Both cursing themselves that they were oblivious to her hurting, their minds immediately thinking the worst of her, thinking she was drinking again when this was far from it.

“I made an appointment at the doctors to get it tested, that’s what the message was about. The one you read.” She pushed out, Aaron’s hands immediately reaching for hers as he squeezed them, wanting her to know that he was right there.

“Why didn’t you just tell us?” Robert asked, and Liv was shocked at the tears in his eyes, shocked at the weakness he was showing her.

“Because you were happy, and in the honeymoon phase and I didn’t want to ruin that. Plus, you’re all going through this with Sarah, I didn’t want to add to the stress of it. And at the end of the day, I’m not part of the Dingles. They don’t care, and why should they? I didn’t want to hurt them, or hurt you, like I’ve hurt you before.”

The confession was heart breaking, all three of them crying. Aaron was squeezing his baby sister’s hands as tight as he could, whilst Robert’s eyes refused to move off of her, and Liv, she was distraught and hurt and insecure, and that alone was a devastating sight, let alone the news they’d just received.

“I found out it was cancer today, and they’re booking me in for my first round of chemo next week.” She pushed out between her shaky breaths. Liv’s eyes flicked between the pair in front of her, clearly devastated by the news. And in an odd way, the girl had never felt more loved. They were heartbroken and distraught at the news or her ill health. They didn’t just turn their noses up, or ignore her, but wanted nothing more than for her to be healthy.

“You’ll always be a part of this family, do you hear me?” Aaron asked her, waiting for a nod in agreement which he received. “And yes, Sarah is going through this, and its heart breaking, but you can’t just expect us all to forget about you, Liv, okay? We’re going to be there for you, at every appointment, on every bad day, on every good day. But you need to start confiding in us when you think somethings wrong. You shouldn’t have been on your own when you received that news. We should’ve been there. You are the strongest, bravest girl I know, but please, Olivia, let us in, let us help you, let us be there for you. Because we love you, just let us love you.”

Before Liv could even respond, the tears continued to fall and Aaron’s lips pressed a soft kiss to her forehead, his hand on the back of her neck to pull her closer to him to allow him to do it.

“You can’t get rid of us that easily.” Robert said, lightening the mood slightly, grateful to see a small smile across the girl’s features, leaning into her brother, wanting nothing more than to be held and loved, and cared for.

“I love you so much.” Aaron whispered into her ear.

“Me too.” Robert added, allowing the teen to settle into the couch, both men either side of her, as they just let her cry, until she fell asleep.

\---

It was a silent decision between Aaron and Robert to carry her upstairs, not wanting to wake her. Aaron’s heart burst at the sight of Liv in Robert’s arms fast asleep, the older blonde with a look of content on his face as he continuously glanced down at the girl who was resting her head against his shoulder. His lips met her forehead as he began following his husband up the stairs, settling her in their bed, rather than her own, wanting to keep an eye on her for the rest of her life.

They both got into their comfier clothes, before sliding in beside her on their designated sides of the bed, both lying down, eyes never leaving Liv as they held onto her hands, and just like that, they all fell asleep.

\---

When Liv awoke the following morning, in between the two people she loved the most, she felt a sense of relief, knowing that with Aaron and Robert either side of her, she could achieve anything. She refused to be a victim of cancer, but rather a fighter. And with a family like hers, not matter what the outcome would be, she felt loved and wanted and needed, and that was all she cared about.

\---

‘She stood in the storm, and when the wind did not blow her way, she adjusted her sails.’


End file.
